


The Starkiller

by Indrel



Series: Tenebrae et Lux [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Darth Tantrum and his Evil Space Ginger, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Force-Sensitive Hux, General Starkiller, Hux Backstory, Hux is Not Nice, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, M/M, Mind Control, Minor Character Death, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, Power Imbalance, Secrets, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow To Update, Tags May Change, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2019-02-14 12:31:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13007838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Indrel/pseuds/Indrel
Summary: Kylo has discovered what or rather who the Presence is and the truth is much more frightening and extraordinary than anything he could have imagined. But the secrets doesn't end there and the further Kylo examines the truth about Hux and his kind the more aware he becomes of the massive forces ruling the galaxy from behind the scenes. Power unlike anything he has ever had before lays at his fingertips for him to grab. But when you play with the same forces that make the galaxy turn the more power you have and the more you learn the more dangerous it becomes. Any mistakes will be severely punished.☼☼☼Hux has a power. A power of galaxy destroying proportions.





	1. Bond

**Author's Note:**

> Here it is; the second instalment of the series. If you haven't read the first part yet I strongly suggest you to do so first since this part builds directly on the first part of the series. 
> 
> The Starkiller takes place during The Force Awakens and somewhat follows the events and timeline of the canon. In this part of the series the full extent of Hux's powers will begin to be revealed and more secrets will be uncovered. Hux's and Kylo's relationship will also be evolved. 
> 
> I'm slow to update since I mostly focuses on writing on my originals stories but I'll try to update more often than I did the first part. 
> 
> English is not my first language and I don't have a Beta so I apologise in advance for any mistakes. 
> 
> This chapter is the last chapter of the previous work in the series but from Hux's POV. Hope you enjoy it.

Hux paced back and forth in the sitting room in his quarters. It was the largest of his rooms and was decorated with several comfortable couches and armchairs located around glass tables. There was an empty fireplace embedded in one of the walls that could be filled with firewood. The walls were a light green colour and were decorated with nature paintings. On a small pedestal there stood a vase filled with a few green branches from one of the trees outside.

Hux liked natural things and usually it was enough for him to look at one of the paintings or breathe in the fresh smell of the branches to calm him down. But not this time. Not when his emotions was boiling inside of him.

20 steps forward until he reached a painting of a waterfall and then 20 steps the other was around until he stood before a painting of a rainy field. He stared angrily at the painting, wishing he was at the field instead of stuck in this room. He missed the feeling of rain on his face, of it soaking through his clothes until it reached his overheated skin. For every second he stared at the painting the angrier he got, until he lost control of the fire inside of him and in a sudden blast of heat and light the painting went up in flames. Staring at the ashes he realised what he had done and got even angrier.

With a frustrated roar he turned his back at the burnt painting and kicked one of the armchairs. It went flying through the room as if it weighed nothing until it shattered against the opposite wall and brought down another painting with it. He had to get out of here before he destroyed the whole room.

After one last angry look around the room he left it behind. With eyes burning from the fire within him, he stalked through the corridor outside him quarters towards the nearest exit. Since the corridor outside his quarters was the same one going through the officers' part of the base towards the main bridge there were a lot of people moving around when he stormed out. Everyone that saw him saluted and lowered their eyes in fear. Some even trembled when he stalked past them. But Hux did not care about them. None of them had awoken these stormy feelings inside him. Only one person was to blame.

Four hours had passed since Hux stormed out of the medcenter. He had watched over Kylo during all three days he had been unconscious, worried out of his mind even though everything had told him that Kylo would be alright. And then when Kylo woke up he showed no gratitude towards Hux for saving his life. Sure Hux hadn't told him exactly how much he had sacrificed to save him, but still. The anger that had been boiling in him ever since Kylo got hurt exploded from him before he could control it. He had wanted to hurt Kylo in that moments and Kylo's fear had only spurred him onward.

Then Kylo had said _that_ thing and suddenly memories and emotions Hux hadn't thought about nor had felt in years flooded back to him at once. He had been completely overwhelmed by the light and love he felt at that moment and had been completely open and vulnerable to Kylo. He had wanted – _needed –_ to hear Kylo say that Word again but instead Kylo had said his human name. The memory of that moment still pained him. He had opened up completely to Kylo only to have his trust and hope shattered.

A scream brought him back to reality. He watched in confusion as several officers ran away from him while screaming at the top of their lungs. He lowered the shields around his mind a fragment so he could reach out with his mind towards the nearest of the fleeing officers to find out the reason for their fear. In response he got an image of his own face, twisted in pain and hatred and with his eyes burning with the intensity of a sun. He could also feel the pain caused by the scalding air.

Hux blinked and forced the fire back to his heart and his face into an expression of indifference. Then with a powerful, sharp thrust with the Force he entered the minds of those that had seen his face and removed those memories with a single surgeon-precise cut. The humans he had affected immediately came to a stop and looked around themselves in apparent confusion before they shrugged of the feeling of wrongness and continued walking as if nothing had happened.

Hux made sure to keep his feelings in control after that. He could remove all unwanted memories without any effort but it would be harder to replace an officer he by mistake burned to ashes.

Luckily he soon reached one of the ground-vehicle hangars. From there he only had to grab a speeder and drive out into the snowy landscape outside.

The cold helped cool down his overheated skin and keep the fire inside. The wind swept at his hair and clothes and the sensation brought a small smile upon his lips, despite the turmoil inside. The snow flew up on him with the wind and soaked his clothes when it melted. The fresh smell from the trees tickled at his nose, much stronger outside in the woods than anything his little branches could produce. The only sounds came from the wind and the speeder he drove. Hux let out a content sigh. He had really missed this.

His eyes saw far into the distance even though the woods, whirling snow and darkness would have severely impacted the sight of a human. In fact now when he didn't have to restrain himself and could let his natural abilities work as they should, the darkness seemed almost as light as day and he trees and snow as much hindrance as a faint mist. Unrestrained he could see all the way to his goal, the Starkiller weapon.

Hux navigated the speeder with ease. Even on full speed it almost seemed to move in snailpace to him. It was a bit frustrating but he tried to convince himself that he should relish in his surroundings instead. He could take his time. It was still several hours before the _Finalizer_ had to leave and he had made all the needed preparations for the journey to Jakku.

Half an hour later he brought the speeder to a stop a short distance from the strip of bare ground that surrounded the weapon. He slowly began undressing. First he let the greatcoat fall from his shoulders and draped it over the speeder's seat. Then he pulled his gloves off and they soon got company by his belt on top of the greatcoat. His dress shirt and undershirt followed suit. Bare breasted he stood in the cold without feeling it, the fire inside kept him warm. He pulled his boots and socks from his feet and smiled at the sensation of snow between his toes. Lastly he pulled of his trousers and underwear and put them with the rest of his clothes.

Without his clothes specially designed to keep the heat from his unnaturally hot body contained the snow under his feet began melting. When he left the speeder behind and walked towards the end of the woods and the bare strip of earth beyond it, he left a trail of melted snow behind him. When a branch brushed against his shoulder the fir needles on it began steaming and sending out smoke. The air itself seemed to dance from the heat his body radiated. This was despite his attempts to keep the heat inside of him for a little bit longer. He did not want to cause a forest fire.

Hux left the forest behind him and walked towards the precipice. At the edge he stopped and gazed down into the depths. He could see the deep rift that reached halfway across the planet's equator in all its glory. And directly beneath him was the weapon itself. Pride swelled in his chest at the sight. This was _his_ creation. And without him it was useless.

He closed his eyes and let go of the iron grip of his feelings. The anger, sorrow and hurt immediately sprung free. In response the fire inside began burning hotter and without further delay he let it out and let go of his human form. The moment the fire burst through his skin imprisonment pure euphoria washed all other feelings and sensations away. But he was not completely free yet.

He hesitated for a moment. It was possible that Kylo was close enough that he would be able to feel Hux's presence when he lowered his mental barriers completely. So far he had worked hard to correct the mistake he had committed when they first met. It had been really difficult to keep Kylo from connecting the dots about him, especially while keeping his mind mostly constrained. If he let it free there was a possibility that all his efforts would be for nothing. But the desire to be free overshadowed all other thoughts and emotions.

The mental barriers disappeared in a flash and his mind began expanding. The sensation was almost painful after having kept his mind contained for a whole month. Though it was nothing compared to all the years he had had to keep his mind constrained in his youth. Once he had kept his mind almost completely imprisoned for 5 years at a row. When he had finally let it free after all that time the pain had been enough to render him unconscious. And when he had woken up again the desolated planet he had been on had a new crater the size of the _Finalizer._ After that he had only kept his mind contained for a maximum of a year in a row. 

His consciousness swept like a wave over the planet and when it did he could feel every single living being on it, all the way down to bacteria and other unicellular organism. The wave ebbed out and once again was he only able to feel his immediately surroundings. After having been contained it would take time for him to reach his full potential.

The Being some called Hux looked out over the world, though he no longer had any eyes to see with. He did not need them so see. With every new 'wave' of his consciousness he became able to see more and more of the planet and the space surrounding it. He gazed towards the stars, his kin, and felt a longing to join them. His soul yearned after company and he began reaching out towards them, towards anyone who could listen to his call. His soul wept when he forced himself to stop. He wasn't ready to meet the rest of his kind yet, not strong enough to be able to stand proudly before them. And until then he had to condemn himself to loneliness.

 

☼☼☼

 

His consciousness began stabilizing itself. The 'waves' became stronger and more frequent and soon he would be able to 'see' the entirety of the world at once.

He had calmed down, all the stormy feelings from before had been burnt away by the fire and the only thing that remained was the peace from being unbound, from being himself. He would have laughed if he still had a mouth to laugh with and he would have cried if he still had eyes that tears could spring from. But in his true form he didn't have to laugh or cry to express feelings. Instead he simply shone brighter and sent out a wave of light that would affect anyone it touched.

It was this new wave of his consciousness that made him aware of something.

A lifeform was moving towards him. And judging by its brightness and strength it was a human.

The Being called Hux by some would have frowned if he had still had a face. The human was moving straight towards him almost as if they new he was here. But that was impossible. Most humans would not be able to feel his presence, only be affected by it. So none of the humans on the planet would be moving towards him with such intent. Unless ... unless they were Force-sensitive.

Dread washed over him and made the light feeling inside of him dim. He was absolutely certain which human was moving towards him. Kylo Ren, the human responsible for the stormy feelings that had made him flee out into the forest.  

It was too late for him to hide; Kylo had already sensed him. He could of course break through the puny shield Kylo protected his mind with and force him to go back and forget about this. But the problem was that he didn't _want_ to. His soul screamed after company and in this moment it didn't care about whom provided it. It didn't help that he had already formed a kind of bond with Kylo when he strengthened the light in his heart.

Resigning to his fate he began bringing his fiery body together into a vague humanoid form that resembled his usual one. Even though his mind remained free and the fire mostly unrestrained he still felt at unease at having to contain his physical body in a humanoid form. Letting Kylo see his true form was out of the question though.  

Hux stood at the edge of the steep with his back towards Kylo's approaching Force-presence. He still had a few minutes before Kylo would reach him and used the time to collect himself. He needed to be in control of himself and his feelings when facing Kylo. Their last encounter had not gone well and he wanted to make sure this one did. Determination made his body burn brighter and in response his mind sent out another 'wave', the strongest one so far.

His body flashed with worry when he felt Kylo fall to the ground behind him and not immediately get back up. He gently touched Kylo with his mind to try to find the reason he had fallen. First he felt the pain and fatigue in his body and a flash of anger mixed with the worry. The idiot was hurt! He should be in bed, resting. But then he discovered that it wasn't the wounds that rendered Kylo motionless. It was _him_.

Shame pulsed through him and he immediately made the most recent 'wave' ebb out. He had not considered what his unbound consciousness could do towards a Force-sensitive person and had as a result hurt Kylo. To make up for his mistake he sent Kylo a strengthening light that was so gentle he wouldn't be able to feel it. A few minutes later Hux could feel Kylo get back up on his feet and begin walking again.

Kylo stumbled out onto the strip of bare ground behind Hux and froze in place. Hux remained still with his back towards him to give him a moment to collect himself. He could feel the confusion and fear radiating of him and beneath it the pain from his wounded body.

Unable to stop himself any longer Hux turned towards Kylo. Kylo gasped and recognition flashed in his dark eyes. For a moment that seemed both eternal and evanescent their eyes interlocked before Kylo fell to his knees before Hux.

_Oh, he's beautiful_ , was the only thought that crossed Hux's mind in that moment. The warmth and light he emitted became stronger. Strong enough that Kylo would be able to feel it.  

Hux stepped away from the edge and moved slowly towards Kylo. Whenever his feet made contact with the ground there was a hissing sound and a small cloud of smoke rose from it. In the light his body emitted Kylo's eyes seemed to shine and burn as if he too had light trapped in him. Hux wanted to liberate it.

Hux smiled at him with both his humanoid mouth and entire body by burning brighter and in response Kylo turned his face away from him. He would have been offended if he hadn't felt the awe in Kylo's mind in that moment.

"What are you?" Kylo asked with a trembling voice. It sounded like music in Hux's ears and he wanted to sing and dance in response. This was not the right moment for that though, so he constrained himself.

Hux thought about Kylo's question. There was a thousand ways for him to respond to it, all of them equally true. Though when he looked at Kylo, at his beautiful face filled with fear and wonder and his shining eyes full of light, he knew how to respond.

"I am the Starkiller!" Hux said and let his voice boom so that the ground shook beneath them. It was true. He _was_ the Starkiller, because without him Starkiller base was nothing more than a scarred planet with living quarters for the humans and what looked like a weapon embedded in its core. However at the same time he was much, _much_ more than a simple weapon of mass destruction.

So while his voice still boomed with enough force to make the ground shake he also sent out a gentle, light thought directly into Kylo's mind. "I am a Sungod."

Kylo fell on his stomach before Hux. He could feel that Kylo's body no longer was trembling and that his heart beat steady, strongly. No feelings of fear darkened the light in his mind, instead his heart shone brightly inside of him.

When Kylo looked up at Hux with his big, dark and _beautifully_ expressive eyes he couldn't help but think about that Word Kylo had said earlier today. Love flooded through Hux's body and his soul instinctively reached out towards Kylo. When it found the love requited in his heart it latched onto him and bonded them together.

In that moment Hux's heart and soul belonged to Kylo and the light and life he emitted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my Tumblr
> 
> Next chapter: The Finalizer arrives to the planet Jakku, a prisoner is taken and a lesson in the Force is learned.


	2. Regrets and inner turmoil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Finalizer arrives to Jakku and Kylo takes Poe as prisoner.
> 
> Kylo and Hux finally talks for the first time since Starkiller Base. Hux discovers a new ability and Kylo learns a bit about Hux' life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took an eternity for me to write this chapter because I constantly rewrote it since I wasn't happy with how it turned out. I'm still not completely satisfied but I don't think it can get any better than it already is. 
> 
> My want to write other fanfiction and original works haven't helped me finish this either.

_ I know that you can hear me _ , Kylo projected towards Hux. The tensing of Hux’ shoulders told him that he was right.  _ Hux, please, just … just look at me. _

Hux stood a couple feet away with his back towards Kylo and spoke to Captain Phasma. Not once since he had entered the hangar had he glanced in Kylo’s direction. In fact Kylo had gotten used to only seeing Hux’ back in the distance during the last three days. It was driving him crazy. 

Kylo had not spoken to Hux since that night on Starkiller Base when Hux had revealed his true nature to Kylo. Not because Kylo hadn’t tried to speak to Hux. But because every time he had tried getting close to him Hux had somehow always managed to disappear before Kylo could do so. This was the closest he had been to Hux since that night. And it was only because Kylo was about to go on an important and possible dangerous mission to get the map leading to Luke Skywalker. Though Hux still wouldn’t look at him. 

_ Hux, I beg you, look at me.  _ Kylo was rapidly losing his composure. Soon he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from walking up to Hux and fall to his knees before him. Of course he had wanted to kneel before Hux constantly since that night on Starkiller Base. But this was the first time he had actually considered doing so in public. And the first time he had the chance to do so. 

Hux’ red hair was a beacon that was drawing him closer. It was the only spec of colour in the otherwise cold room. Kylo stepped closer. The sound of Hux’ voice was music to his ears, singing to his heart to move closer. Kylo indulged it and took another step. Every shifting of Hux’ body was like a dance Kylo longed to dance with him. He stepped closer. 

“Hux, look at me.” Kylo stood close enough that he could touch Hux if he only reached out to him. His knees trembled from a deep desire to fall to the floor. Every part of him wished for nothing more than to worship Hux. 

Hux tensed and his conversation with Captain Phasma haltered, he turned his head slightly towards Kylo, but not enough for him to see his eyes. “I can’t”, Hux whispered.

Kylo’s heart soared and sunk at the same time. It soared because it was the first time Hux had spoken to him since that night on Starkiller Base. And it sunk because of the words Hux had spoken. 

“Why?” Kylo breathed so that only Hux could hear him. 

“Please Kylo, I just can’t. Board your ship and go to Jakku. Get that map for the First Order.” The first words were spoken so quietly that only Kylo could hear them but the rest was spoken with the intention to be heard by everyone in their vicinity. They had also been spoken with a tone of hostility in his voice. The intention was clear. 

Kylo turned his back to Hux and moved away from him. The least he could do was honouring Hux’ wishes, even though it made his heart ace. He would get the map for Hux and he would never ask of him to look at him again.

When Kylo placed his foot at the ramp to his ship something suddenly made him stop. The gentle pressure of something warm and familiar skimmed the outskirts of his mind.  _ Be careful, _ Hux’ voice said in his head. A burst of light followed it and Kylo’s heart soared.  _ I will _ , he promised before the presence disappeared. Kylo stepped aboard his ship. 

**☼☼☼**

_ "Be careful."  _ The words rang clearer in his mind than any of the sounds around him. The shuttle shook as it entered Jakku's atmosphere. The stormtroopers around him checked their weapons and armour one last time and repeated their orders to themselves. An officer called out an update about the battle that raged bellow. 

Kylo tried to force himself to focus on the present, but nothing seemed as important as the last words Hux had said to him before the ramp to the shuttle had closed and separated them. He couldn’t even get himself to care that he maybe would be able to complete a long-time goal of his. The map to Skywalker was down there, something he had searched for for years. He was  _ so close _ to achieving his goal of ridding the galaxy of the Jedi. And somehow he still couldn't think about anything beside Hux. 

"We're landing in a few seconds, sir", someone said behind him, pulling him from his thought, and Kylo almost activated his lightsaber in response. He managed to contain himself and simply nodded.

As reported the shuttle soon landed with a muffled rumble. The ramp began lowering and Kylo prepared to leave the shuttle. When the ramp opened he could hear the crackling of fire and when he strode out of the shuttle he could see that the village before him was on fire. Its inhabitants had been gathered in some kind of pen and were being guarded by the stormtroopers. The fire reminded him of Hux. It was beautiful. 

Kylo’s thought was pulled back to reality when two stormtroopers moved to meet him, pulling an old man with them. An old man Kylo recognised from the time before he had become Kylo Ren. If anyone had the map to Skywalker it would be Lor San Tekka. Anger began boiling inside of him at the sight of the old man and he marched up to him.

"Look how old you have become." The voice modulator in his helmet distorted his voice. It made him sound menacing and inhuman. 

"Something far worse has happened to you", Tekka replied with an almost pitying tone in his voice. His eyes stared straight into Kylo's without showing any fear.

An angry grimace crossed his face, but it was hidden by the mask and Kylo did not let his body language betray anything about his emotions. "You know what I have come for."

"I know where you come  _ from _ ", Tekka said with emphasis on the last word. "Before you called yourself Kylo Ren."

"The map to Skywalker, we know you found it", Kylo said as calmly as possible and tried to quench the anger boiling in his gut. He needed to stay in control. "And now you are going to give it to the First Order." 

"The First Order rose from the Dark side, you did not."

"I'll show you the Dark side", Kylo growled. 

"You may try, but you cannot deny the truth that is your family", Tekka said and once again his voice was full of pity.

_ How dare he! How dare he pity me! _ Kylo grabbed his lightsaber; his hand was trembling from rage.  _ I am the grandson of Darth Vader!  _ He looked Tekka straight in the eyes and raised his lightsaber. At the highest point in its arch Kylo activated it and in a sudden blast of heat and red light he cut Tekka's body in two.

The body had barely hit the ground when Kylo heard an enraged shout and then the sound of a blaster firing. He wiped around towards the sound and saw the bright light of a blaster shot moving towards him as in slow-motion. Without thinking he threw out his hand and focused on the light with the Force. A sudden surge of power flowed through him towards the blaster shot. It stopped in the air, not like it had been hit by a wall; more like the air itself had solidified to trap it. Kylo stared in disbelief at it for a moment before he remembered the shooter and turned his attention towards him instead.

The shooter was obviously a Resistance member. The anger still boiling inside him combined with fear of almost getting shot made him explode. Even while two stormtroopers ran forward to restrain the shooter he felt an overwhelming want to march up to the man and cut him to pieces. In that moment it didn't matter that the Resistance member probably knew where the map was, he only wanted to maim and kill. His hand trembled when he tried to force himself to lower the lightsaber.

His attention was caught by the blaster shot that still hovered in the air. He had never before tried to stop a blaster shot and had not bothered trying now either; he had only tried to deflect it. Therefore he had been very surprised when it had stopped. Kylo wasn't sure he  _ could  _ stop a blaster shot so completely. But someone else could...

_ "Be careful",  _ Hux' voice seemed to whisper in his mind. He saw Hux’ face before him and imagined that a small smile would have played on his lips. Hux' eyes would be neither blue nor red; they would be a vibrant green colour, the colour of Life.

Kylo's hand stopped trembling. His heartbeat calmed and his breathing stopped being erratic. The angry grimace the helmet had hidden softened into an almost-smile. He deactivated the lightsaber and put it back at his waist. Hux wanted him to return safely, had even stopped a blaster shot from the  _ Finalizer  _ to make sure that happened. He would not disappoint him.

When he looked towards the Resistance member once more he had already been restrained and the stormtroopers had begun to drag him towards Kylo, past the glowing blaster shot. The man looked at the floating light with wide eyes. Kylo  _ would _ get that map, for Hux.

Kylo was so focused on returning to the  _ Finalizer  _ he barely paid any attention to the prisoner when they spoke. The man was contained and would soon be questioned. None of his taunts faced Kylo when his mind already was by Hux' side.

As soon as the Resistance member was dragged towards one of the ships Phasma walked up to him. Kylo forced himself to focus on her. He wasn’t quite sure why Hux respected her. As far as Kylo could tell there wasn’t anything particular special about her. But Hux did respect her, which meant Kylo respected her too. Though he could barely keep his mind on her question about the villagers. They were his enemies but would most likely not have any useful information for the First Order. So he gave the order to kill and promptly forgot about them. Only Hux mattered.

Kylo turned back towards his shuttle. On the way to it he walked past a stormtrooper and something about them made him pause. Kylo studied the stormtrooper for a second before realizing what was wrong. They had a mental shield. It was weak and wobbling but it was a shield nonetheless. Kylo's brow furrowed. A week ago he would have been relieved to find out that at least one of the stormtroopers had any kind of mental shield. Now it made him worried in a way he couldn't explain. He had to bring this to Hux' attention soon.

The thought of Hux made him eager again and he hurried towards the shuttle. He could feel the moment when the blaster shot was released behind him. The power that had held it disappeared and when it did the blaster shot continued moving as if it had never stopped. It flew past the strange stormtrooper and exploded against a building. Kylo smirked when the stormtrooper flinched. As soon as he was aboard the shuttle he ordered the pilots to prepare for takeoff. It was time to return home.

**☼☼☼**

Hux closed his burning eyes and forced the fire to return to his heart. When he opened them again they had returned to their ice blue colour. He stood at the huge durasteel windows at the  _ Finalizer’s _ bridge. The vastness of space spread out before him, only interrupted by the light of distant stars. Every single star signalled to him the location of one of his kind. He imagined that he could see the light of his Mother’s star among them, even though he knew that he was too far away to be able to see it. It had been years since he last saw her and he missed her something terribly. 

Through the bond he had tied to Kylo on that night at Starkiller Base he could feel him getting closer. Just moments ago he had opened the bond completely for the first time since he had established it. It had made it possible for him to look through Kylo’s eyes and see everything that he saw. Therefore he knew that Kylo was bringing a prisoner to the  _ Finalizer.  _ And that he wouldn’t be able to pretend that he had had nothing to do with the stopping of that damned blaster shot. 

When he had seen the blaster shot moving towards Kylo he had panicked. He had used the Force through Kylo to stop the blaster, even though he had felt that Kylo was about to direct it past himself. But when Hux had 'seen' the blaster shot moving towards Kylo the need to protect him had overwhelmed him and Hux had acted without thinking.

It was only the latest thing on the long list of regrets he had about his interactions with Kylo. 

Luckily Lt. Mitaka walked up to him before he could begin to fret over them. "Sir, Kylo Ren is returning to the ship. He has taken a Resistance member prisoner."

"Good", Hux said. "I want the prisoner to be brought into an interrogation chamber the moment they're brought onboard. Everything they know about the Resistance will be forced out of them.”

"Yes, sir", Mitaka replied and hurried of to issue the command.

With every passing second he could feel Kylo getting closer. He would without a doubt want to talk to Hux when he came back. Before the inevitable confrontation Hux needed to find some peace and quiet to make sure he was in control when it happened. He turned his back to the stars with a deep sigh and stalked out of the bridge. His officers were capable of handling the ship while he was gone. And if something happened that needed his attention they would contact him. 

Hux marched past his office. It was too close to the bridge and held to many distractions. Instead he walked the longer distance to his quarters. They were smaller than his quarters on Starkiller Base but more personal and comfortable. 

After the harsh and dark architecture of the  _ Finalizer’s  _ interior his private quarters was almost like an explosion of colour. Sure, the basic shape of the rooms was the same as the rest of the ship. But the walls were covered with paintings from his home planet Anarkis. Soft, green mats covered the hard floor, mimicking the appearance and feeling of grass. He had painted thousand of stars on the ceiling in the same patterns that could be seen from the surface of Arkanis. Several colourful comforters were spread throughout the room. There even was an ice blue sofa. Every available surface was covered in plants. Small, sweet smelling flowers stood upon tables while bigger plants stood on the floor by the walls. In the centre of the room there was a small fireplace. 

Hux shrugged of the greatcoat and hanged it in the closet beside the door. He removed his shoes and the belt around his waist. The gloves soon followed and he put them all in the closet with the greatcoat. The rest he kept on even though the fire resistant cloth was quite uncomfortable. It was meant to keep the heat his body radiated contained as to not raise suspicion. 

Hux walked up to the fireplace and opened the hatch. He pressed his finger against one of the firewood’s inside. Through the finger he sent a blaze of heat into the wood and soon a small fire began burning inside the fireplace. With a satisfied smile he closed the hatch and sat down in the ice blue sofa. 

A soft meow greeted him from the entrance to the bedroom and a moment later Millicent came into view. The orange cat hurried up to him and purred when he picked her up and placed her on his knee. Hux began petting her soft, warm fur. The sound of her purring and the crackle from the fire together with the fresh scent of the plants and burning wood calmed him down in a matter of seconds. 

Hux closed his eyes and sighed happily. 

Only seconds later a loud, banging noise that came from the door to his quarters disturbed him. The fire in his heart lurched outwards and when he opened his eyes he knew that they were aflame. Millicent hissed at the door and jumped from his knee. When Hux walked to the door she kept close to him. 

The door opened with a soft swishing sound and when he saw the person outside he too wanted to hiss. Kylo stood outside with his helmet in his hands. The nervous expression on his face immediately turned into one of happiness when he saw Hux. Hux quickly turned his face away from Kylo, but it was too late. He had already met Kylo’s big, brown eyes. 

“What are you doing here?” He asked with more hostility than he had intended. Kylo’s presence had surprised him and considering the bond he had tied between himself and Kylo that shouldn’t have been possible. He hadn’t been prepared to be face to face with Kylo so soon. Beside him Millicent picked up on his mood and bristled while she hissed at Kylo. Her support was touching. 

Kylo flinched and that’s when Hux realised that his eyes were still aflame. He forced the fire back into his heart. “I guess that you may as well come in”, Hux said with a gentler tone in his voice and stepped aside so that Kylo could come in. After a short hesitation Kylo stepped forward and the door closed behind him. 

Hux watched Kylo closely when he took in his quarters. Kylo looked around the room with wide eyes. Whatever he had expected from Hux’ private quarters it was obvious that it wasn’t this. After a moment of hesitation Hux walked back to the sofa and sat down. Millicent immediately jumped up in his knee again. She studied Kylo with hostility in her eyes. 

“You have a cat?” Kylo asked with surprise evident in his voice. He slowly sat down in the comforter next to the sofa. 

“Her name is Millicent and she’s technically not a cat.” Hux scratched her behind one ear and she purred happily. But her eyes never left Kylo. It was already too late to try to avoid his eyes. So Hux let himself indulge by looking into those dark depths. “She is actually a fire spirit from my home world in the shape of a cat. My Mother gave her to me the day I left.”

“A fire spirit!” Kylo exclaimed. “Wait you have a home world?”

The surprised expression on Kylo’s face brought a small smile to his lips. “Of course I have a home world. I was born on Arkanis.”

“Really? I mean I read that you were from Arkanis in your files but I never imagined…” Kylo said.

“What? That maybe I was born like you were? Well I was. And like my file probably told you my father actually was Brendol Hux. However the identity of my Mother is something only I know. She is the Goddess of the sun Arkanis circulates.” Hux slammed his mouth shut. 

_Why the krif did I tell him that?_ _Stop talking! Or better yet erase his memories!_ He had spoken without thinking but that was no excuse. 

In fact it was acting without thinking things through that had caused him to be in this situation to begin with. Hux had not thought things through when Kylo had been on his way to the  _ Finalizer _ . So instead of putting up his mental shields he had let his mind roam free. Of  _ course _ Kylo had been suspicious of his presence, anyone with the slightest of Force-sensitivity would have been. Then he had again and again let his emotions take control of him, making the fire inside break free, instead of hiding that part of himself. And to top it all of he had revealed himself completely in front of Kylo. Hux had showed Kylo his true self. Had even told him that he was a Sungod. Kylo Ren, Snoke's apprentice, the last person he should have revealed anything for. 

He should stay away from Kylo the way he had done since that night on Starkiller Base. However Hux knew that that wouldn’t be enough. Not anymore. He knew what he  _ should _ do instead. He should destroy all of Kylo's memories of his powers. Delete everything and start over and this time actually hide what he was. 

Contradicting emotions tore his mind in different directions. One of the greatest advantages of having a mind as vast as his was the ability to feel several emotions at the same time and think several things simultaneously. But now it was like the different parts of his mind was tearing him apart. Because of it he was able to regret his decisions and think of a plan to fix everything at the same time as he felt content with the way things were and had no want to change anything at all. A small part of him even wanted to tell Kylo everything, wanted to make the bond between them stronger and deeper. Wanted more Kylo in general. It was confusing. And frankly a bit terrifying. Especially the last part. 

The conflicting emotions were too hard to bear. The fire inside pressed against his skin and forced itself out through his eyes. Every time he breathed the fire burned brighter. It hurt. He forced himself to stop breathing and pressed his eyes closed. 

“Hux? Hux are you alright?” A hand enclosed his and Hux flinched. He waited for the inevitable withdrawal of Kylo’s hand. But it never happened. His skin had to be several degrees too hot and yet Kylo didn’t move his hand. “Hux, please look at me”, Kylo begged and Hux didn’t have the strength to refuse him. 

Hux opened his burning eyes, expecting Kylo to flinch. Instead he only moved closer. Kylo’s big, brown eyes met his and nowhere in their dark depths could he see any fear. In fact Hux was sure that he could see affection in there, though he quickly discarded that thought. Of course Kylo couldn't feel any affection for a creature like himself. 

“Why do you hide yourself from me?” Kylo asked and squeezed his hand. “Do you think that I would betray you? Because I would never do that! Never!” Kylo moved even closer. He stood on his knees before Hux, like he was praying. They were so close together that Kylo’s face was only a couple of inches from his burning eyes. “Please don’t hide.”

The fire inside died down only to be replaced by a new warm feeling. It was not the warmth of fire but that of Light. His heart lurched inside his chest and began spreading the Light instead. Hux closed his eyes and when he opened them again they were no longer burning. Nor were they made of ice. He smiled at Kylo and his whole face lit up in response. 

“I won’t hide, I promise”, Hux whispered in the space between their faces. 

**☼☼☼**

Kylo was lost in the warm, blue depths of Hux eyes. They were drawing him in with their beauty. Without thinking he leaned closer to Hux. 

Sharp claws slashed at his jaw and he jumped backwards with a surprised scream. Hux’ cat -  _ Millicent was it? _ \- hissed at him from Hux’ lap. Kylo had completely forgotten about her during his and Hux’ conversation. 

Millicent’s eyes burned in the same way Hux’ had done just moments ago. Kylo backed away from her slowly. His jaw burned where she had clawed him. He pressed a hand against the wounds expecting it to bleed. Therefore he was surprised to find that the wounds had been cauterized. 

“Oh my stars! I’m so sorry!” Hux exclaimed and stood up with Millicent in his arms. The cat was still hissing and her red fur had begun moving in a way that resembled fire. “Millie, stop it! Kylo didn’t mean any harm”, he chided the cat and incredibly enough she stopped hissing and her fur returned to normal. Only her burning eyes revealed that she was not as calm as she seemed. 

Hux placed the cat on the ice blue sofa and hurried to Kylo’s side. He knelt beside him and gently moved Kylo’s hand out of the way so that he could get a better look at the wounds. The wounds burned but Hux’ warm touch momentarily made him forget about the pain. 

A glazed look appeared in Hux’ blue eyes and he carefully pressed his hand against the cauterized scratch wounds. The touch sent a wave of warmth through Kylo. Suddenly Hux’ eyes changed colour. The soft blue deepened into a glorious, vibrant green that shone with the light of a thousands suns. In their green depths Kylo thought that he could see all the Light and Life in the universe. 

All his daydreams about Hux’ green eyes paled in comparison to the reality. Kylo’s heart grew wings inside his chest and a Light seemed to fill his entire body. He could not turn his eyes away, and neither did he ever want to. Hux beauty was that of divinity. He wanted to worship him for the rest of his life. 

Suddenly Hux blinked and the green colour disappeared. It was replaced by the deep blue that indeed was beautiful. The vibrant green colour, the colour of Life, simply was on another scale of beauty altogether. Hux removed his hand from Kylo’s jaw and crawled backwards until his back hit the couch. An expression of wonder and surprise replaced the glazed look from before. 

Kylo had been so focused on Hux that he had completely forgotten about his pain. Now he tentatively raised one hand to his jaw and felt the place the wounds had been only moments before. No trace existed that he had been wounded to begin with. 

“Did… did you heal me?” Kylo asked with awe. 

“I think so…” Hux replied, still with the same surprised expression on his beautiful face.  “I've never healed anyone before but according to my Mother that is an ability all of my kind possesses.”

Kylo crawled closer to Hux and took on of his hand in his. Hux skin was several degrees warmer than that of a regular human. It warmed his cold skin wonderfully. “Thank you”, he said earnestly and revealed in the blush that appeared on Hux’ cheeks. 

“It was no problem; it barely took any power at all.” Hux carefully withdrew his hand from Kylo’s and Kylo had to stop a whine from leaving his mouth at the loss of contact and warmth. 

Hux stood up and put a considerable distance between them. His eyes drifted from Kylo and a frown appeared on his brow. Kylo wanted to walk up to him and make it disappear but forced himself to stay where he was. It was obvious Hux wasn’t comfortable with the situation and Kylo decided not to push it. After all he had managed to make Hux look at him. 

“We should go check on the prisoner”, Hux said without looking at him. 

“Yeah, you’re right”, Kylo said and rose. “I want to know what he did to the map leading to Skywalker.” He walked to the door and put the mask on. Hux followed at a slower pace. They stepped out into the  _ Finalizer’s  _ hallways together. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: The interrogation of Poe and his eventual escape with the help from Finn. Hux is left doubting his abilities. 
> 
> As always my tumblr is evilspaceboyfriends-trash if you want to come talk to me about kylux.

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr 
> 
>  
> 
> Next chapter: The Finalizer arrives to the planet Jakku, a prisoner is taken and a lesson in the Force is learned.


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